How Prince William and Prince Harry are navigating fresh family turmoil – and why their childhood trauma will forever bind them

For the Prince of Wales and the Duke of Sussex, navigating the sudden re-emergence of those dark days is a deeply personal ordeal – a quiet reminder that, despite their ongoing rift, no one else truly understands the grief they share.

The revelations – including details relating to the aftermath of Diana’s death in 1997 – prompted a rare, direct response from Buckingham Palace in defence of the King. In his book, Swan Song: Diana, My Sister, the Earl made the sensational claim that Charles had said of Diana, immediately after his former wife’s death: "We'll forget her soon enough."

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In a statement mirroring the late Queen's observation that "recollections may vary" following Harry and Meghan’s controversial interview with Oprah Winfrey in 2021, a spokesperson for the Palace said: “While we do not comment on books as a matter of principle, His Majesty is mindful that the pain of fraternal grief can cloud reason, affect judgment and colour memory in ways others do not recognise, even many years after such a loss.”

Keep calm and carry on

Yet for the two brothers, whose childhood trauma was once again put under the spotlight, the week was defined not by the noise, but by quiet resolve. Crucially, HELLO! understands that neither William nor Harry had prior knowledge of the book’s contents.

Left to process their resurfaced pain in the public eye, the estranged brothers – who have not spoken to each other for years – met the moment with an almost identical, instinctive response: simply getting on with the job.

The Prince and Princess of Wales, who are known as the Duke and Duchess of Rothesay when they are in Scotland, carried out official duties with their trademark warmth and focus as they visited the Isle of Bute.

HELLO!'s royal editor Emily Nash joined them, witnessing first-hand how the couple brought genuine enthusiasm to a trio of engagements celebrating local communities, despite the damp weather and the inevitable shadow cast by Earl Spencer’s new book. 

Although William appeared perhaps a shade more reserved than on other recent outings, he  remained fully engaged throughout the day. He and Kate helped with a beach clean in Ettrick Bay, tried the traditional sport of shinty and enjoyed a drink at a local pub. These were everyday royal engagements, but they underscored the couple’s steadfast commitment to duty.

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In London, an upbeat Prince Harry arrived solo – without Meghan by his side – to champion wounded veterans at his Invictus Spirit Awards at the Old Royal Naval College in Greenwich, maintaining his unwavering commitment to the cause. 

In his first interview since his family’s shock return to the UK last month, speaking exclusively to HELLO!, Harry admitted that the past few weeks had been "eventful" – a nod to a turbulent period that included our exclusive story revealing that he and Meghan had been forced to pull their children out of their new school after just two days because of fears regarding security.

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Yet, despite the pressure, a relaxed and happy Duke insisted that he was fully focused on the future. “It’s been eventful. But, you know, we’re getting stuck into the work,” he told HELLO!’s editor, Jessica Callan. “Kids are in school. We’re happy. And as I said, it’s great to be back on British soil, and looking forward to Birmingham next year for the Invictus Games that’s coming up.”

Although Harry is no longer a working royal and their paths remain separate, both brothers last week drew on a familiar family trait: duty. William, of course, shoulders the burden of responsibility in supporting King and country, alongside his personal causes, while Harry’s commitments have been fewer since he departed royal life. But the siblings kept their focus on work in the face of family drama last week.

Emily Nash says: "What else can the family do? However they are feeling about it all, they are not going to react publicly. William has a laser focus on his own projects and his own family. He has a direction that he wants to steer the monarchy towards in the future, and he has to maintain that focus, no matter what.

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“Harry is attempting to settle back into life in the UK. He has been close to his uncle Charles Spencer, staying with him over the summer, but he’s also made clear that he wants to reconcile with his father, so he can hardly take sides.” 

Certainly, their uncle’s incendiary claims – including further allegations that their father sounded "giddily elated" and like a "lottery winner" following Diana’s death – have reignited painful feelings. 

“William and Harry have no option – in public, at least – but to keep calm and carry on. William, in particular, has inherited the late Queen’s ability to compartmentalise, and I think we saw that from him this week while he was out on duty,” Emily adds. 

Recollections may vary

Royal correspondent Katie Nicholl, the author of The New Royals: Queen Elizabeth’s Legacy and the Future of the Crown, offers an account that differs starkly from Earl Spencer's recollections. Although he claims that he fought bitterly against Prince Charles in relation to demands that William and Harry walk behind their mother’s coffin, saying that he told Charles: “That’s not going to happen,” historical evidence suggests that the encouragement for the boys, then aged 15 and 12, to take part came from an entirely different member of the royal family.

"From my conversations with the late Queen's cousin Lady Elizabeth Anson, I know it was actually the late Duke of Edinburgh who suggested to the boys that they should walk behind their mother’s coffin, telling them that if they didn't, they might regret it later in life,” Katie tells HELLO!.

She adds: “No one recognises [the Earl’s] claims as being characteristic of the King. Those I've spoken to who are close to His Majesty say that this simply doesn't tally with the man who was in tears when he went to Paris to collect the late Princess's coffin.”

As the royal biographer and HELLO! contributor Ingrid Seward observes, the suggestion that Charles reacted with anything other than profound grief to Diana’s tragic death is particularly painful to him – and a narrative that he would never want his sons to believe. 

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"The last thing that Charles would want is for William and Harry to think that he didn't love their mother," Ingrid says. "And he did love their mother – she told me herself that he did. He just didn't love her in the way she needed.”

Ingrid, whose new book, Catherine & Diana, is out this week, explains how Charles’s actions in the devastating days following Diana’s death tell a very different story to the Earl’s claims.

Far from being indifferent, he fought fiercely behind Palace doors to ensure that his former wife was honoured with the utmost dignity. "Charles was the one who insisted that Diana lie in state at the Chapel Royal [at St James’s Palace], and that she be buried with all the dignity due to her," Ingrid says. "Things were extraordinarily passionate and fraught at the time.

"I think the King was obviously incredibly hurt by Earl Spencer’s book," she adds. "He must have considered the implications of issuing such a statement and realised the agony it might stir up, but he felt so strongly that it was put out remarkably swiftly."

The next generation

The resurgence of their painful shared history has no doubt strengthened William and Harry’s resolve to protect the next generation. Having lived out their childhoods in the relentless glare of the spotlight, with their parents’ divorce making daily headlines, both brothers are resolute that their own children will have a different upbringing. 

William and Kate ensure that their public appearances with Prince George, 13, Princess Charlotte, 11, and Prince Louis, eight, are carefully managed, ensuring that the children have plenty of space to grow up away from the cameras. Meanwhile, Harry and Meghan largely shield Archie and Lilibet from the public eye.

Aside from one official engagement for Archie at the age of four months, and a couple of handout photographs, the Sussex children have appeared only in photos posted on Instagram where their faces are not visible. 

So, despite all that divides them, this shared instinct as protective fathers – and their experience of loss – continues to connect the estranged brothers. There is also their commitment to their public work, whether inside or outside the Firm.

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What's next for William and Harry?

Looking ahead, both siblings remain focused on the future. Prince William is gearing up for his biggest Earthshot Prize to date, heading to Mumbai, India in November to highlight 15 pioneering finalists, potentially with Kate by his side.

Prince Harry, meanwhile, is strengthening his ties with his UK charities, having made a high-profile appearance at the WellChild Awards in London this week.

As Emily Nash observes: “They both have very complex feelings about what happened all those years ago, and now they are faced with learning about discussions that they were not party to at the time.

“I’m sure it must be incredibly painful to see it all play out in public, just as the so-called War of the Waleses between their parents did during their childhoods.

“They won’t want a Windsor versus Spencer feud reignited at a time when they’re trying to move their lives and their families’ lives forward.”