Next month Ben Fogle and his wife Marina face a difficult milestone – the one year anniversary since the death of their son, who was stillborn. Ben opened up about the devastating tragedy during an appearance on This Morning on Monday.
"We lost him at eight months or so," he told hosts Eamonn Holmes and Ruth Langsford. "It's incredibly painful because of that very reason – it's someone you nearly met, you dreamed of meeting, you projected what your family would be like, you projected the three children together, you did the nursery, you'd told the children.
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Ben Fogle opened up about the devastating death of his son, who was stillborn
"To have that stolen from you is painful in a way that unless you've been through it yourself you can't understand, and that's why we've spoken about it."
He continued: "I think if you're in the public eye like I am… I'm not only going to only show the golden moments (of my life) because we all suffer highs and lows. My wife and I now appreciate our children. We make the most if it…"
Marina was around 33 weeks pregnant when she suffered a stillbirth – and very nearly died herself. When Ben heard the news he was thousands of miles away in Canada and got straight on a plane to London, not knowing throughout the ten-hour flight if either his wife or their baby had survived.
Ben Fogle and wife Marina with their two children Ludo and Iona
"I lost a son I never met and had to get to grips with the terror of losing Marina," Ben told the Daily Mail a few weeks ago. "It still gives me heart palpitations and panic attacks. And to have to name Willem retrospectively… it was just so unbelievably painful."
Ben revealed that he and Marina will mark the anniversary with a private ceremony in an Oxfordshire church – just the two of them and the priest who married them. "We felt we should do something," he said. "Perhaps people find it hard to understand how losing a child before it has been born can affect you so deeply, but it really does. It feels like something has been stolen from you."