You may have heard of tiger parenting or what it means to be a lighthouse parent, but have you ever considered the fact that you could be a dolphin parent?
This new term circulating the world of parenting advice relates to a style that encompasses the idea that parents should be firm but flexible, channelling the intelligent, social and playful energy of the sea creature.
To be a dolphin mum or dad means that you are setting clear boundaries for your children while allowing them their independence to gain confidence and the ability to think for themselves.
Authoritative in nature while balancing the extremes of other parenting styles, dolphin parenting appears to offer a happy medium, but what does it entail, and are there any cons to this approach?
I asked the experts for HELLO! readers so that you can decide for yourself whether to swim with the dolphins or stay on dry land.
Where did the term come from?
The idea of dolphin parents was originally coined by Dr Shimi Kang in her book The Dolphin Way: A Parent's Guide to Raising Healthy, Happy, and Motivated Kids Without Turning Into a Tiger.
The concept behind dolphin parenting is that children are guided by guardians who nurture their inherent nature.
"It is inspired by the behaviour of dolphins, which are intelligent, social, and playful," Dr Sasha Hall, senior educational and child psychologist and a parent of two, told HELLO!.
She added: "The idea is that parents should be firm but flexible. They set clear rules and expectations while also encouraging independence, creativity, and emotional well-being.
"The goal is to raise children who are confident, motivated, socially capable, and able to think for themselves, rather than focusing only on academic success."
How dolphin parenting differs from other parenting styles
To understand the potential and also the limitations of dolphin parenting, it is easiest to compare it with other styles, such as tiger and jellyfish parenting.
While other approaches take on a more authoritarian or permissive approach to raising their children, dolphin parenting falls somewhere in the middle.
Tiger parents are driven by a desire to see their children achieve wild success at any cost, while dolphin parents are firm but flexible and adapt to the specific needs of their child as and when they change.
Meanwhile, jellyfish parents operate without any rules or structure and are guided by their child's desires more than anything else.
This is different in dolphin parenting as they offer a chance to be independent but within a supportive framework that promotes guidance and collaboration.
Benefits of this parenting technique
Becoming a dolphin parent has a lot of pros, as it encourages open communication and dialogue between the parent and child.
The style offers the parent a chance to be a supportive role model, sharing advice and guidance whilst also balancing the need for the child to be an individual person.
It is said that children raised by dolphin parents have a deep sense of self and confidence, both in their own abilities and socially.
Dr Sasha outlined the benefits of being a dolphin parent as:
- "Promotes self-confidence and emotional resilience
- Encourages independence and intrinsic motivation
- Supports social skills and empathy
- Balances responsibility with creativity and play
- Provides a flexible, responsive approach that adapts to a child’s needs"
Potential downsides - is it always the best approach?
While there are an abundance of positives, there are also some drawbacks to approaching parenting in this way.
There is a fine line when it comes to promoting independence in children, and when pushed too far, it could lead to a hands-off experience instead of one that gives the child a chance to grow.
Dr Sasha also weighed in on the negative aspects of dolphin parenting and outlined the scenarios in which you may need to consider an alternative option.
She warned that "finding the right balance between flexibility and structure can be tricky" as "some children may need more routine or guidance than this approach allows".
"The approach is largely based on theory and observation rather than formal research. If applied inconsistently, it can unintentionally lean toward permissive or overly controlling parenting," the expert concluded.
Real-life examples of dolphin parenting in everyday situations
Parenting is a trial-and-error experience that works best as you learn what approaches your child is receptive to and what styles they reject.
Dolphin parenting can be applied to a multitude of different everyday scenarios that affect your child and yourself.
Some examples include homework time at home. Dolphin parenting here would look like setting a strict, consistent time for homework to be done, but letting the child choose what subject they work on first.
Another example in everyday life is when a parent sends a child off to speak to a person in a position of authority themselves rather than doing it on their behalf.
If a child has an issue, a dolphin parent will support and encourage them to visit the teacher and speak with them independently before getting involved themselves.