"My daughters - look how gorgeous they are," remarked Brooke Shields, who was joined by Rowan, 21 and Grier, 19, during a Zoom call to discuss Commence, Brooke’s hair care brand designed for women over 40.
"I used to be like that and I’m not that any more," she added, with that relatable pang of pressure that many of us feel as we get older.
The child star shot to fame aged just 11 for her role in the controversial film, Pretty Baby. She was Vogue’s youngest ever cover model at just 14, and the original Calvin Klein girl.
But what struck me most while chatting about the powers of scalp serum and dry shampoo - the Instant 2-in-1 Dry Shampoo is on my Mother’s Day wish list by the way - was how ‘normal’ Brooke was, especially when it came to talk of her daughters, beauty and ageing.
© AFP via Getty ImagesThere was no media polish. No Instagram filters.
Just the kind of emotional honesty that makes you feel, well, ‘normal’ too.
While praising her daughters, she added: "Am I less than? Am I over? Am I attractive? There’s so much that happens, especially if you have daughters, as we are watching you guys at the beginning of this flush - just everything is ahead of you and it’s luscious and high and perky and no lines.
"We then look at ourselves and think, ‘OMG I didn’t appreciate it when I had it,' or 'OMG, am I less than now?'"
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Brooke clearly has a deep empathy for midlife women like her, and while she doesn’t pretend that ageing is easy, she also refuses to shrink.
And as a woman approaching 50, positive older role models like Brooke serve as a reminder that ageing gives us an opportunity to be seen, just in different ways.
© Bruce Glikas/Getty Images“The time a woman becomes a certain age - 40, it starts - she becomes invisible, and totally overlooked,” she explains.
Invisible - a word that I’ve heard again and again from friends and followers. And one that I hear in my own head. And if Brooke feels it, it’s no wonder we all do too! Yet as I sit across from her, albeit on a screen, she still looks as beautiful as ever, more so because she is genuine, warm, funny, confident, and real. So not invisible. At all.
Brooke is not afraid to own her vulnerabilities and try out new things - stepping into her role as CEO of Commence in her late fifties is proof of that, and as she explained, it has reignited her purpose at midlife.
“I never dreamt of becoming a CEO. I never thought I would start my own company. It’s a role I never thought I would get. I didn’t know anything about it. I had to learn an entirely new language. I had to learn how to talk to people differently, but it felt very exciting to learn a new skill in my fifties."
© Getty ImagesBrooke’s refreshing realness sets a positive tone for all of us approaching our fifties and sixties, and as she reflects, it’s this rawness and authenticity that sets 40-plus women apart from the rest.
"I never set out to influence, I set out to tell an honest truth," Brooke explained. "There’s a reason why everyone is feeling censored and a feeling that they ‘can’t’ because the attack is so visceral on social media, in the news, everywhere. Individuality is just attacked, and there is such a feeling of fear and conforming, and all looking the same. And there is a lot of emotional pressure, and that’s just with our generation. That is daunting to me."
Hearing Brooke talk about ageing with her daughters by her side - celebrating their ‘flush’, as she put it, and reflecting on how women often feel less-than in comparison - I realized how much power there is in sharing our stories. Not just the polished parts, but the uncomfortable ones too.
© Getty Images“What I set out to do is just tell my story - where I’m afraid, where I feel good, where I want to change and make better. What my issues are. But I want to do it with humour. And by presenting that story, I do think it has a positive effect because people come to the story and they say, 'OMG, that happened to me.'"
Brooke’s gut-punch truthfulness is exactly why she is still so beautiful and such a powerful role model. She’s using her voice and visibility not to gloss over ageing, but to make space for it.
"I try to live honestly and authentically in the present," she adds. "And I hope that the messaging that we put out with Commence and that I represent just by being honest about the good, the bad, the ugly, the funny, the great in my life, having been in the public eye for so long - that it becomes a relatable conversation to have. I don’t think it’s any big feat of mine, I’m just a famous person who’s been around a long time. So I hope it’s changing and I hope it’s educating people. Giving women agency to care about themselves and not be scared of the big bad wolf that is over 40."
Amen to all of that…and as I count down to 50, this is why I am learning not to dread it, I am seeing it as a new beginning.
