Why is my hair becoming belligerent at 48?

My crowning glory has been feeling a little less glorious of late. They say you don't know what you've got until it's gone, and after years of cursing my impossibly thick hair (yes, I know how that sound,s but try wrangling a wild cloud of frizz into a school swimming cap for years), I'm now feeling rather disheartened at the dwindling girth of my ponytail. But it's not just the loss of volume that bothers me. What's really irking me is how my hair has grown more unruly over the past year, right on cue with the arrival of perimenopause. Coincidence? I think not. A recent release from Fresha, a beauty and wellness booking platform, confirmed what I always suspected: our hair changes roughly every seven years, and this can extend to texture. Celebrity hairstylist Jess Elbaum, who collaborates with sulfate-free haircare brand Hask, has noticed the same trend and notes that many clients are blindsided by the shifts that the menopause can trigger.

The Seven-Year itch

© TSARKOV

TikTok has already latched onto this idea with a wave (literally) of 'wavy hair realisation' videos explained by Fresha's experts as being down to the fact that as our hair naturally changes with age, resulting in many of us suddenly discovering hidden waves. "Every seven years or so, hormonal shifts, ageing, and lifestyle changes alter how follicles behave. That means someone who grew up with poker-straight strands may notice waves appearing in their twenties or thirties, while others see curls relax into looser textures later in life."

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In my case, I've always known my hair has a strong natural wave. The trouble is, what my hair wants to be (wild waves with a halo of frizz) and what I want it to be (sleek, face-framing silkiness) are at odds resulting in a weekly battle of wills. Lately though, my hair has staged a full rebellion; resisting any attempts (through product or tools) to turn it into said sleek strands, frizzing more than ever and sprouting random kinks that elude even the most robust straightening irons.  

Texture Tonic

According to the brilliant consultant trichologist and Philip Kingsley brand president Anabel Kingsley, this is no surprise. Our hair growth cycle is strongly influenced by hormones – especially oestrogen and testosterone. "Just as skin quality changes with age, the hair fibre and the scalp that houses our follicles also deteriorates," she explains. "Studies also show hair can change shape and become less manageable," which, given my recent experiences at 48, suddenly makes perfect sense.

Embracing The Change

If I were to frame it more positively, I'd say my hair has simply adopted the same unapologetic 'give-a-damn’'attitude that defines perimenopausal woman (silver linings and all). Fresha's experts sum it up rather beautifully; "Your hair evolves with you. Understanding the seven-year cycle helps people stop fighting their natural texture and start embracing it, which is where healthy, beautiful hair really begins. We see countless clients who thought they had unmanageable straight hair, when in fact it's a wavy pattern that's been there all along. The mistake is trying to flatten it with heat or strip it with daily washing. With the right lightweight products, gentle drying, and wave-enhancing techniques, those hidden curls can look glossy and intentional.” Anabel echoes this, recommending pre-shampoo treatments or conditioners like Philip Kingsley's Elasticizer, £39 / $44, to restore strength, lightweight heat-protective oils to restore the hair’s lipid layer and a gentler approach overall – think flexible brushes and microfibre towels.

My hair revelation 

Visiting Anabel's clinic recently was a revelation in itself. For years I've described my hair as 'thick' and 'coarse'. In reality? It's fine – just lots of it. That distinction alone reshaped how I approach my routine. Out went the heavy masks designed for thick hair and in came products for fine hair – like my new-found shower buddy, Olaplex's Weightless Nourishing Mask, £39 / $44. The difference has been game-changing. My hair may be becoming more belligerent with age, but at least we’re now on friendlier terms.