I gave birth at 42 when I was in perimenopause

Everyone knows how exhausting those first few months of motherhood can be. Now imagine adding crippling anxiety and (even more) disrupted sleep to those emotional and physically draining first few years?  

This was the challenge facing Colette Courtion, the CEO of intimate wellness brand Joylux, who fell pregnant in her 40s while experiencing symptoms of menopause. "I gave birth at 42 - when I was in perimenopause," she explains to HELLO! "While I was caring for a child I was also dealing with [perimenopause symptoms]."

Menopause is not something that many women in their 30s think about, yet a new study has found that over 50% of women may experience symptoms of perimenopause as early as 35 - a period of life when many women are also welcoming babies for the first time. 

© Shutterstock / Natalia Deriabina

At 38, Emma Smith began experiencing unexplained exhaustion, anxiety and disrupted sleep, which she initially put down to the demands of raising her energetic two-year-old daughter. But as the symptoms persisted and new ones emerged, including brain fog and irregular periods, Emma realized something deeper was at play.

"I thought I was an exhausted mum, but then my periods became erratic, I was suddenly waking up at 3 a.m. drenched in sweat, and my patience seemed to disappear overnight. That's when I knew it wasn't only parenting fatigue."

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"I always assumed menopause was something that happened much later," Emma says. "It never crossed my mind that I could be dealing with hormonal shifts while still changing nappies and running after a toddler."

Colette and Emma's experiences are far from unique, as perimenopause can begin in the late 30s or early 40s, sometimes even earlier. Symptoms can be subtle at first, but they often escalate, affecting mood, energy levels, and even cognitive function - all of which can be particularly challenging when juggling young children.

For Emma, the most difficult part was how her symptoms were impacting her daughter. "I felt like I was losing myself," she admits. "There were days when I struggled to remember simple things - where I put my keys, why I walked into a room for. And the worst part of that was the guilt. I worried that my short temper and exhaustion were affecting my daughter."

Hormonal fluctuations can lead to heightened anxiety, irritability, and even depressive symptoms, and many women assume they're overwhelmed by motherhood, when in reality, their estrogen and progesterone levels are fluctuating dramatically and exacerbating symptoms.

Seeking answers, Emma turned to her doctor, who initially dismissed her concerns. "I was told I was too young for menopause and that it was probably stress," she recalls. It wasn't until she consulted a menopause specialist that she received the validation she needed. "Having a doctor listen to me and confirm what was happening was life-changing," she notes.

"I started prioritizing sleep hygiene, cutting back on caffeine, and incorporating more strength training into my routine," she shares. "I also explored hormone replacement therapy (HRT), which has been a game-changer for me."

© Poberezhna

For Colette, the hardest part of navigating perimenopause while raising a newborn was coping with the physical changes of both postpartum recovery and hormonal shifts at the same time. "I learned firsthand what women go through in dealing with their pelvic floor health," she explains. "I'm specifically talking about the common vaginal health issues that women face from bladder leakage, incontinence, vaginal dryness, pain with intercourse," she adds. 

Frustrated with the lack of support and help and having spent her life working in anti-aging cosmetics and technology, Colette took the matter into her own hands and invented the world's first light therapy device for 'down there' care, and vFit is now recommended by celebrities including Halle Berry and Oprah. The banana-shaped device helps promote a stronger pelvic floor and more control thanks to LED red lights, with results possible in just one week. 

© Disney via Getty Images

Collette and Emma hope that by sharing their stories, other mothers in similar situations will feel less alone. "If there's one thing I've learned, it's that perimenopause is not just a 'middle-aged woman' issue - it can affect you while you're still deep in the trenches of motherhood. And that's why we need to talk about it more," explains Emma. 

And for women navigating perimenopause while raising young children? Her advice is simple: "Trust yourself, seek support, and know that you're not alone. The more we share our experiences, the easier it will be for future generations of mothers to recognize the signs and get the help they need."