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Pauley Perette's life and career: From NCIS stardom to Mark Harmon feud, health struggles and retirement from acting

The former actress is known and loved for playing Abby Sciuto in NCIS 

Close up of Pauley Perette at the Human Rights Campaign 2023 Los Angeles Dinner
Megan Bull
TV Writer
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Crime aficionado Pauley Perrette found her calling on the hit procedural drama, NCIS. Signing on as Abby Sciuto – an eccentric and exceptionally talented forensic scientist – Pauley's off-beat performance cemented her status as a TV icon. 

Known and loved for her 15 years on the show, the 54-year-old has continued to march to the beat of her own drum, following her sudden departure from NCIS in 2018. And, after swapping acting for activism, Pauley continues to use her star power to support causes close to her heart. 

From her early ambitions as an FBI agent to her big break in NCIS, subsequent feud with Mark Harmon and eventual retirement from acting, here's what you need to know about Pauley Perette. 

WATCH: Pauley Perette's style evolution

Early life 

Born in New Orleans on March 27, 1969, Pauley was primarily raised in the Southern states and has lived in Georgia, Alabama, Tennessee, and South Carolina, among others. 

Pauley Perrette at an Emmys party in 2006© Getty
Pauley Perrette was born in New Orleans

Speaking to PEOPLE Magazine in May 2018, the NCIS alum revealed that she'd been "completely obsessed" with crime stories as a kid, and "would cut out every article," about cases she was interested in, adding: "I really don't like bad guys."

As a result, Pauley went on to study criminal science, sociology and psychology at Valdosta State University in Valdosta, Georgia. Having grown up with "almost no movies or TV," acting was never a priority for Pauley. Recalling how she entered the industry, she explained: "I started my master's degree in criminal science, but then I moved to New York and I was broke and bartending.

Pauley Perrette with blonde hair at a Hollywood event. © Getty
Pauley had never planned to be an actress

"When I was bartending I started working with this director that put me in 15 back to back … everything from commercials, music videos to short films. Then, suddenly I was in this business." 

Among her earliest credits, Pauley starred in the TV shows Murder One (1996), Frasier (1996), That's Life (1998), Time of Your Life (1999-2000) and Dawson's Creek (2001), before landing her big break.  

NCIS stardom

Pauley became a household name in 2003 after appearing as forensic scientist Abby Sciuto in NCIS – a role which she'd embrace for the next 16 years. During her stint on the show, the A-lister would also receive three People's Choice Award nominations for her portrayal. 

"Twofer" -- NCIS is called in to investigate when the body of a missing Navy Lieutenant who disappeared a year and a half ago is located by a cemetery grounds crew while they are relocating caskets on the property. Also, Gibbs and McGee must pass a psych evaluation with Doctor Grace Confalone (Laura San Giacomo) before officially resuming all work responsibilities, on NCIS. Pictured:  David McCallum, Brian Dietzen, Pauley Perrette.© Getty Images
Pauley joined the cast of NCIS in 2003

Speaking about the character's conception, in 2007 Pauley shared: "[NCIS creator] Don Bellisario told me that when he created Magnum, P.I. he wanted to introduce a Vietnam vet who defied the negative stereotype. 

"So with Abby, he wanted to take an alternative-style person with tattoos and make her someone who is happy, totally put together and successful. All the script said about her was: black hair, caffeinated and smart."

Pauley Perrette as Abby Sciuto© CBS
Pauley received three People's Choice Award nominations for her portrayal

Asked about the character's signature style, Pauley added: "She's completely unaware that anybody thinks she looks weird. She thinks she looks pretty and never calls herself anything other than happy. And I fight for that." 

A cultural phenomenon, Pauley's portrayal has also encouraged fans to pursue maths and science. "Over the course of 15 years, it started very early, [girls] have modeled themselves after this TV character. It made math and science not only a viable plan for them, but it made it accessible and it made it fun and it inspired these girls," she raved to PEOPLE in 2018. 

Pauley Perrette as Abby Sciuto© CBS
Her performance was critically-acclaimed and inspired fans to pursue careers in maths and science

"It's been so heartwarming, and it's been such a real thing. These are real people, who now 16 years later have gotten their degrees in science and math all because of Abby."

Mark Harmon feud and quitting NCIS 

Pauley's decision to exit NCIS came as something of a shock to fans. In 2018, the actress confirmed the news on Twitter. 

"It is true that I am leaving NCIS after this season," she wrote. "It was a decision made last year. I hope everyone will love and enjoy EVERYTHING ABBY not only for the rest of this season, but for everything she has given all of us for 16 years. All the love, all the laughter, all the inspiration. I love her as much as you do."

Mark Harmon and Pauley Perrette as Gibbs and Abby on NCIS© CBS
Pauley Perrette allegedly clashed with Mark Harmon behind the scenes

After waving goodbye to Abby in the season 15 finale, reports quickly emerged of a feud between Pauley and her co-star, Mark Harmon, which executive producer Charles Floyd Johnson has since addressed. Recalling an on-set incident which had sparked tension, he said: "In Pauley Perrette's case, there was an incident with the show with a dog. 

WATCH: Abby Sciuto leaves the NCIS team

"The dog was Mark Harmon's, and apparently the dog bit someone. Pauley was a huge, huge SPCA [Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals] animal person. And then the dog kept coming with Harmon, and she felt it wasn't safe for the show. By the end of that year, she just felt like it wasn't working for her anymore, and it was time to move on."

Mark has since left NCIS; in October 2021 the actor ended his 18-year run as the CBS drama's lead, with his character, Special Agent Gibbs, deciding to retire from law enforcement. He has never spoken out about his alleged feud with Pauley. 

Romantic relationships 

While Pauley prefers to keep her relationships out of the spotlight, the actress has spoken about her four-year marriage to Canadian-American singer, Coyote Shivers. The pair – who tied the knot in 2000 – had separated by 2004, with Pauley obtaining a restraining order against her ex.

Pauley Perrette and musician Coyote Shivers© Getty
Pauley was married to musician Coyote Shivers for four years

In the past, Pauley has referred to Coyote as a compulsive liar who cannot be trusted, and she also accused him of stalking her. Their divorce was finalized in 2006. Following the split, Pauley has been engaged twice. 

From 2005 to 2009, she dated cameraman, Michael Bosman. While they never legally wed – Pauley revealed the couple would not tie the knot until California's Proposition 8, which banned same-sex marriage, was abolished – they did exchange vows in front of family and friends. "We just kind of wanted it to be about an ideology of everybody and of generosity and community," she told Entertainment Tonight

Pauley Perrette and Thomas Arklie © Getty
The TV star was engaged to Thomas Arklie

The couple eventually split in 2008, with Pauley going on to date former British Royal Marine Thomas Arklie, and announcing their engagement in 2011. By 2019 it was revealed that the couple had called time on their relationship.

Health woes

In 2021, Pauley suffered a "massive stroke" after experiencing complete numbness along one side of her body. In an interview with Entertainment Tonight, the 54-year-old recalled the terrifying experience. "I woke up and had no feeling on the entire right side of my body," she began. "At first I thought I had just slept funny. 

Pauley Perrette attends The Los Angeles LGBT Center Gala at Fairmont Century Plaza© Getty Images
The actress suffered a stroke in 2021

"When I kept realizing the extent of the numbness; couldn't feel my finger touching my face, couldn't feel my face being touched by my finger, couldn't feel my laptop sitting on my lap, no feeling at all on the right hand side — I could have burned myself or cut my finger off and wouldn't have known. I called my doctor and he said, 'Go to the emergency room immediately.'" 

Initially, Pauley, who was just 52 at the time, had been hesitant to go to the hospital, and hoped to speak with her therapist – who is also a neurologist – about her condition first. But, after her doctor warned her of the consequences of leaving it too long, she was persuaded to go. 

Actress Pauley Perrette attends the Greater Los Angeles Zoo Association's Beastly Ball 2023 at the Los Angeles Zoo on June 03, 2023 in Los Angeles, California© Getty Images
Pauley was initially relucant to go to the hospital

"[I] Walked into the ER and said, 'Hey, I can't feel the right hand side of my body and…' BAM! OMG! I was on a gurney with a million things stuck in my arms and a bunch of medical people rushing me somewhere," she explained. "They know how serious a stroke is and how immediate care is imperative."

While Pauley was able to recover from the stroke, she decided to keep her health struggles a secret. It wasn't until a year later that the actress shared her story on Twitter. "It's 9/2. One year ago I had a massive stroke," she penned on Twitter. "Before that I lost so many beloved family and friends. And daddy. And then Cousin Wayne. Yet still a survivor after this traumatic life I've been given so far. And still so grateful. Still so full of faith. And STILL HERE!" 

pauley perrette fundraiser project angel food lead with love 2023© Getty
Pauley has since recovered and hopes to spread awareness of the symtoms

During her chat with Entertainment Tonight, Pauley added that she wants "people to get educated about all signs of a stroke, especially that you can have one at any age! By knowing signs of a stroke, we can save ourselves and others." 

MORE: NCIS feuds: fallouts and firings that have seen stars leave show 

READ: Mark Harmon's life and career: From NCIS stardom to on-set feuds, Pam Dawber marriage and incredible act of heroism

Retirement from acting

Pauley waved goodbye to acting in 2020. Two years after her departure from NCIS, the TV legend revealed that she'd officially retired on social media.

pauley perrette rare appearance human rights campaign dinner 2023
Pauley announced her retirement from acting in 2020

Confirming the news on Twitter, she declared: "I finally and happily retired! And this is what I was looking forward to!!! My rules in life now are 'If my #rescuedogs don't care, it's cool!' I only answer to God and animals and plants now. WOOT!!!" 

View post on Twitter

Pauley's surprising decision came five months after her beloved sitcom, Broke, was canceled by CBS. Her stint on the show had been a healing one, with the actress stating that it had "restored my faith in people, in this industry." 

Following her retirement, Pauley continues to reside in Los Angeles and has turned her attention towards activism and philanthropy. She's also taken a step behind the camera, and recently directed the 2023 documentary, Red Ribbons of Love