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How to stop yourself from retreating this autumn

Confidence coach Tiwalola Ogunlesi shares why the change in the season is the perfect time to face our fears

Woman drinking tea from an autumn mug
Melanie Macleod
Wellness Editor
1 November 2023
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When autumn rolls in, it's natural to want to put off future plans, deciding instead to hunker down at home, delaying your dreams until the summer months.

To challenge our desire to retreat, we called upon the advice of the ever-inspiring Tiwalola Ogunlesi, a confidence coach who never fails to help us get in gear – no matter the season.

In an exclusive video for HELLO!, Tiwalola implores us not to be put off chasing our dreams, even if we're feeling the fear.

Woman smiling in a gold blazer
Tiwalola Ogunlesi is a confidence coach

"Fear is a natural human emotion. When we've never done something before, we feel afraid," she explains. "Fear has kept us safe, because it alerts us to danger and makes sure we stay alive.

"But when it comes to our dreams, if we feel fear, it's a sign that we must move forward, not retreat."

Tiwalola wants to break the generational cycle of low self-esteem in women and girls, and in her inspiring video, she shares how she overcame the fear and negativity that were swirling in her head.

Explaining how understanding fear helps us overcome it, Tiwalola explains: "Fear is a negative thought of something in the future that hasn't even happened yet. You often go into your future and think of all the things that could go wrong, and it makes you afraid.

Woman in a cosy yellow jumper© Shutterstock
It's tempting to retreat during autumn

"Negative thoughts lead to negative feelings, leading you to retreat and give up. Instead of thinking of all the worst things that could happen, think of all the positive things that could happen. Imagine the outcome you want for yourself. Positive thoughts lead to positive feelings, which leads to you taking action.

"Whenever fear comes up, instead of thinking 'what if I fail?', make the choice to think 'what if I succeed?' and just go for it," Tiwalola encourages.

Watch Tiwalola's video on how to overcome fear and be inspired to work towards your dreams this autumn. 

WATCH: The ultimate motivation from confidence coach Tiwalola Ogunlesi

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