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Hoda Kotb makes rare comment about relationship with ex-fiancé Joel Schiffman

The Today show host ended her relationship with ex Joel Schiffman in December 2021

hoda kotb
Faye James
Senior Editor
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Hoda Kotb offered a glimpse into her past relationship with her ex-fiancé, Joel Schiffman, in a conversation with Jenna Bush Hager.

Their discussion, which focused on the significance of showing love and respect in a partnership, especially in front of children, aired on a recent pre-recorded episode of the morning show.

The co-host of Today with Hoda and Jenna, 59, reminisced about the courteous gestures that marked her time with Joel, particularly highlighting how he consistently showed respect in their day-to-day interactions. 

"I’ve only been with people who are super polite. Like, when I get up from the table, for instance, Joel got up every time –– every time –– even if it’s normal dinner," she shared. 

Hoda Kotb's ex Joel Schiffman with their daughters
Hoda Kotb's ex Joel Schiffman with their daughters

This act of kindness and respect left a lasting impression on Hoda, illustrating the standards she holds for how partners should treat each other.

Jenna, 42, speculated that Hoda's expectations for such treatment might stem from witnessing her own father's behavior towards her mother, suggesting that these early observations shape our understanding of what we deserve from our partners. 

Jenna helped set up the date for Hoda© ABC
Jenna recently helped set up a date for Hoda

Hoda agreed, emphasizing the importance of these interactions not only for the couple but also for their children, who learn about relationships through observation. 

"Yes, it’s what you deserve, what you feel like, ‘Oh yeah, I deserve that,’ but I do think it also shows like, when your kids are watching, ‘Oh, that’s how two people treat one another,’ [and] not like, ‘Get me this!'" Hoda elaborated.

Hoda's reflections on her relationship with Joel also took a humorous turn when she recounted a mix-up with their sneakers. She and Joel had identical pairs, differing only in size. 

One day, she mistakenly wore his sneakers, realizing they fit. The exchange that followed was both comical and telling of their comfortable and genuine connection. 

Hoda Kotb© John Nacion
Hoda Kotb

"The only thing I ever did was, Joel and I had the exact same pairs of sneakers — except for different sizes, I assumed — and when I put on his sneaker and it fit, and he was like, ‘Where are my sneakers?’ I go, ‘I don’t know,’ he goes, ‘They were right here!’" 

Hoda recounted, laughing at the memory. "It was sad!" she added, underscoring the light-hearted moments that can occur even in relationships that have since changed.

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