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The Do's and Don'ts of giving a wedding speech: Advice from Kevin Jonas' planner and more

By Heather Galloway


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March 24, 2016
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You have been asked to make a speech at your best friend's wedding. At first, you feel honored and are flooded with gratitude. Next, you wonder if things could go wrong and various rom-coms come to mind – like the hilariously ditzy toast made by Kristen Wiig in Bridesmaids as she got caught up in one-upmanship.

But before getting caught up in Kristen's major speech faux pas, don't panic! We have some top tips from celebrity wedding planners and experts that will help you navigate your way to success...

Michael Russo, TV host of Mikie Saves the Date! and wedding planner to Kevin Jonas and Dancing with the Stars pro Witney Carson, says:

DO make the speech about the couple, not just one half of it. Include how you know them, what they mean to you and how their love impacted your life. Also, say what you wish for them in their marriage.

DON'T make the mistake of thinking you're on a comedy show. If you're not funny, sit down. There is also an extensive list of things you should avoid mentioning: divorce, death, exes and the bride and groom's lives before they met. 

 Don't try to be funny if you're not, advises Kevin and Danielle Jonas' wedding planner 

Sarah Haywood, go-to international commentator for Prince William's wedding to Kate Middleton and “Britain's most sought-after wedding planner” according to Time magazine, says:

DO ensure that a lapel microphone is available to anyone delivering a speech.

DON'T keep interrupting a meal for speeches – as opposed to simple toasts. It destroys the flow of conversation and can make the reception dinner feel like a series of starts and stops.

Prince Harry called brother Prince William 'The Dude' and Kate Middleton 'The Duchess' during his humour-filled speech at their wedding 

Lisa Bonos, Lead Writer and Editor of Solo-ish, says:

DO craft your speech around a specific theme that everyone in the room can relate to and understand. The first time I was asked to be Maid of Honor, my specific theme was 'Five Pieces of Marriage Advice from a Single Woman' – which was inspired by things I knew about the bride and groom and what I'd seen of their relationship. I kept my eyes open on the big day for anything that would fall into those five categories and was then able to pull out a few examples that everyone had witnessed. This allowed me to appear prepared but spontaneous at the same time!

Do keep smiling, advises All My Friends are Engaged author Jen Glantz. Here, bridesmaid Taylor Swift is glowing with her BFF bride, Britany Maack Photo: Instagram/taylorswift

Jen Glantz, author of All My Friends are Engaged  and founder of Bridesmaid for Hire, says:

DO make sure you keep a smile on your face. That will automatically boost the tone and energy of what you are saying as well as helping to kick aside the nerves.

DON'T color your speech with a ton of inside jokes that will only be understood by, say, the bride. Remember you are trying to keep all the guests engaged.

And on a final note, we'd like to suggest you watch how Hugh Grant stumbled through a minefield during his best man's speech in Four Weddings and a Funeral:

Best man Speech - Four Weddings and a Funeral

Hopefully, with our expert advice on how to give a wedding speech, you'll be one of the highlights of your BFF's big day!

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