Francesca Amber, the Sunday Times bestselling author of Manifest Like a Mother, knows first-hand how hard it can feel to carve out time for yourself when you’re raising children – let alone build a regular manifesting practice. Yet she’s living proof that it can be done. A single mother of three beautiful girls, Francesca - who also hosts the hit Law of Attraction Changed My Life podcast - is living a life she could only dream of following the breakdown of her marriage and her business. And it’s all down to manifesting.
I caught up with her when she’d just wrapped up her UK book tour (another thing she manifested!) to hear all about how us mums can follow her lead and attract our dream life by weaving manifesting into the fabric of everyday family life. Here, she shares her 5 most powerful tips…
1. Turn chores into meditation
Forget needing total silence and an hour to yourself to meditate. Francesca explains that even household tasks can double as a form of mindfulness. "Previously, when other people would talk about self-care or meditating, I would feel so, like, personally angry," she laughs.
"I was like, I literally do not have the time for self-care. I don't have time for myself at all. And I would often feel like my brain was so crammed full that I just couldn't think, I was at my bandwidth.
"So when I discovered that if you do something with your hands that takes more physical effort than that it takes mental effort, and if it is done mindfully, it’s considered a meditation, I was like, ‘Oh my God, I can meditate whilst putting the dishes away. I can meditate whilst folding the laundry. I can meditate while doing the dishwasher, all these things!'"
© Getty Images/iStockphotoSo by reframing chores as "cognitive rest," you create small but powerful windows for clarity and creativity. But you have to put your phone away, don’t listen to any music or a podcast – just be present with the task at hand. You could be amazed at the ideas that pop up when given the space. "You’ll come up with so many creative solutions," she says.
2. Declutter with intention
Clutter doesn’t just crowd your home - it clouds your energy too. "Before my book tour, I decluttered my whole house. But I wasn’t doing it thinking, 'Oh, this will make my house nice and tidy'. My whole thing was: 'I’m going to be a Sunday Times bestselling author this summer, so I need everything clear and ready for that – I’m going to be so busy,'" Francesca explains.
She adds that clutter "literally raises your cortisol level, which of course dips your vibrations. If you wake up and your house is together, you feel like you’ve got your [expletive] together. And then it gives you the brain space to think, 'What do I actually want to achieve today? How can I move closer towards my goals?'
"Whereas I know that if I wake up in the morning and I'm drowning in laundry, and it’s messy, you'd better believe that I can't focus on my goals and dreams - because I'm thinking I've got to get myself ahead with the house, I've got to clear up."
3. Be kind to your future self
Francesca believes one of the most powerful forms of manifesting is looking after "future you."
"Think about the kind of person you want to be in the future, and take action in the present for her," she explains. "Every Sunday night, I plan my week so that future me can have an easier life. I love myself and I want me to have a good week."
© Getty ImagesWhether it’s leaving painkillers and water by your bed before a night out, or making bigger investments like Invisalign (which she did to prepare for TV opportunities when she was manifesting her book’s promotional tour), she says: "It’s a gift to future me.
"Sometimes I think of myself as my fourth daughter, and I'm like, 'Oh, I'm just doing it for another one of my daughters’ - because I wouldn't hesitate doing things to make their life easier. And so the more I do that, the more I'm able to manifest - because I'm worthy of more. It's amazing."
4. Dress for the life you want
What you wear can send a powerful message to the universe - and to yourself - about the life you’re creating. "When I want to dress for the life that I want, I am showing up in the world how I want to be portrayed, and embodying who I want to be in the future, now," she says.
That doesn’t have to mean putting on a full face of makeup every day. "At weekends, I don't bother with my makeup, I scrape my hair back, I'm just wearing something comfy around the house. Is that spoiling my manifesting? No. I do not dress for the life I want every day.
"But the problem I find is that, for me, and I think a lot of other mothers, is that we often let that spill over into every day. Even when we go out to an event, we’re not dressing for the life we want. When you do show up as your future self, it’s powerful. You’re telling the universe this isn’t a distant dream, it’s happening now."
5. Visualise the feeling, not the how
When you’re overwhelmed by the details of how you’re going to get to where you want to be, Francesca says it’s better to focus on how you want to feel, rather than how you’ll get there.
"If you don’t know the answer, don’t try to visualise the specifics. Visualise a scene instead - maybe your child’s birthday in the garden, or Christmas morning with your family. Focus on the feeling rather than the details," she advises.
By tuning into the emotion you’re seeking, you allow the universe to work out the logistics. As Francesca puts it: "We don’t need much spaciousness to start creating. It’s about finding those little moments, even in a busy mum life, and using them with intention."
Manifest Like A Mother, published by Rider, is out now
