Singer Jewel is radiating confidence in her latest holiday photos – but the calm exterior belies a far more turbulent past. The star, 51, recently posted beachside images from Barbuda, where she appeared relaxed and at ease, a far cry from the trauma she says shaped her childhood and early career.
Appearing on the Verywell Mind podcast in 2023, Jewel opened up about her fractured relationship with her mother, Lenedra Carroll, whom she alleges stole millions of dollars from her.
"I didn’t really realize what my mom was until I was 30-something," the 'You Were Meant for Me' singer told host Amy Morin. "I woke up and realized she embezzled all of my money, over $100 million."
The realization, she said, went far beyond finances. "As I started investigating the truth about what my mom had told me in my life versus what was true, I had realized that pretty much everything I formed my reality on was fiction," Jewel said.
© GC ImagesThe Utah native recalled being 34 when the full impact became clear. "[I was] 34 years old [when I] realized I'm $3 million in debt, realize my mom stole it, realize everything I thought my mom was, isn't what she was," she said. "It is a very difficult psychological thing to come to terms with."
Jewel explained that the complexities of her relationship with her mother stretch back to her parents' divorce when she was eight. "My mom and dad got divorced when I was 8, and we went to live with my dad," she said. "Nobody told me it’s because my mom didn’t want to be a mom. She left us, and so my dad took over raising us. I didn’t know that at the time."
© Getty ImagesDespite the distance, Jewel said she repeatedly sought out her mother as a child. "I would hitchhike 500 miles to go see her. I’d show up on her doorstep," she recalled.
She contrasted Carroll’s demeanour with that of her father, Atz Kilcher, whom she has previously described as physically abusive. "My dad was this volatile alcoholic that hit me, very easy to identify [as a] 'bad guy,'" she said. "My mom seemed like the opposite. She was calm, she was soft, she never yelled, obviously never hit me."
Only later did Jewel come to recognise what she now describes as another form of abuse. "I didn't realize I was being abused in another way at the time," she said. "If you asked me when I was 9 to maybe even in my 30s, I would've thought I had a supportive figure."
She shared a disturbing example from her childhood visits. "She would say, ‘Your mind is so powerful… I think you could sit here and stare at this light bulb and you might be able to get it to turn off with your mind,'" Jewel said. "That is such an abusive, effed up thing to say, but I felt so loved."
© Getty ImagesJewel ultimately left home at 15 to escape her father and briefly experienced homelessness. Speaking to Forbes in 2016, she reflected on her determination to break the cycle. "Statistically girls like me end up repeating the cycle we were raised by," she said. "I did not want to be a statistic."
While Lenedra has not publicly responded to Jewel's claims, the singer said she has focused on healing and self-preservation. "The amount of trauma in my life, the amount of neglect, moving out at 15… I had a very scary life," she said on the podcast. "Learning how to remove myself is how I found safety."
