Carrie Fisher's daughter Billie Lourd has shared an incredibly poignant post, nine years after her mother's death.
The 33-year-old took to Instagram after recounting a sweet moment with her own three-year-old daughter Jackson.
"My daughter woke up earlier than usual this morning so we went outside together and she knowingly laid her little head on my chest. She looked up at me with her big soulful eyes and said “I love you mama” and grabbed my face with her little chubby hands and kissed me," she began.
© Instagrm"She does this pretty much every morning and dare I say, there is no better way to wake up and no ritual I love more. I told her how much her grandmomby would have loved her and she looked up at me and kissed me again," she continued.
She then said that they met with her dad and "they ran around together like 2 old souls that have known each other forever."
"Watching my dad with my kids is one of the greatest joys I’ve ever known. The kind of joy that makes your face hurt because you can’t stop smiling, the kind of joy that makes you feel like your life is a movie you thought only existed in movies. But then you take a step back and realize that it’s better than any movie could ever be.
She then started thinking about how this joy wouldn’t be possible without her own mom.
© AFP via Getty Images"This joy only exists because she existed. So even though she is not physically part of this joy, she is part of the reason for it. Even though she is not alive she lives on through this joy. My grief takes on many shapes - today, right now in this moment, that shape is this joy I get to experience watching my kids with my dad.
"It could and will change shapes multiple times throughout this day because grief is never just one thing but right now I am relishing in this bittersweet grateful joy.
"As my mom wisely said, 'Nothing is ever really over. Just over there'. My mombys life isnt really over. Just over there - in my kids and in this joy I’m able to experience because of her.
She then ended the post with the heartbreaking words: "I will never stop missing you."
The actress who was best known for her role as Princess Leia in Star Wars died on December 27 in 2016, after going into cardiac arrest. "She was loved by the world and she will be missed profoundly," Billie said in a statement at the time.
© CBS via Getty ImagesA day later, Billie's grandmother Debbie Reynolds died of a stroke, adding to the family's heartbreak.
Billie is the only child of Carrie and talent agent Bryan Lourd, who were together from 1991 until 1994; when Bryan came out as gay to Carrie, the pair split and continued to co-parent. Billie and her mom were extremely close before her death.
Last year, Billie spoke about her mother's addiction: "While she was alive, she always shared the ups and downs of that struggle with others in hopes it would help them escape their own addiction," she said in an Instagram post. "As an addict, being open about the struggle is the only way through."
Billie finished the emotional post with a hopeful message: "Sending my love to anyone out there who has lost someone to drug addiction. You are not alone."
© VarietyDespite dealing with these family tragedies, the Scream Queens actress has welcomed two children, Jackson and Kingston, since her mother's death. She shares her two kids with her husband, Austen Rydell.
On her mother's death day in 2022, Billie described the intricate feelings surrounding her children and her mother, mourning the fact that they will never meet.
"My mom is not here to meet [my children] and isn't here to experience any of the magic," she wrote in a social media post. "Sometimes the magical moments can also be the hardest."
"That's the thing about grief. I wish my Momby were here, but she isn't. So all I can do is hold onto the magic harder, hug my kids a little tighter. Tell them a story about her. Share her favorite things with them. Tell them how much she would have loved them."
