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Hoda Kotb gets real about dating struggles: 'I was so worried about fitting into his life'

The Today Show star shares two children with ex-fiancé Joel Schiffman

Hanna Fillingham
US Managing Editor
May 23, 2024
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Hoda Kotb is refreshingly honest about her personal life and is incredibly relatable too! 

During Thursday's episode of Today with Hoda & Jenna, the TV star was chatting about dating with co-star Jenna Bush Hager, following on from Kate Hudson's recent confession that she had taken a year off from dating. 

After Jenna admitted she had got lucky meeting her husband Henry Hager in her twenties and marrying young, Hoda spoke about how her attitude towards finding the right partner has changed over the years - and for the better. 

She said: "When you meet someone you imagine a family, a wedding, kids, you see it. But then it's like 'stop, stop!'" She admitted that she used to meet a man and think "one of the things I used to want when I met someone was 'does he like me? I hope he likes me,' rather than 'this is who I am'" 

The NBC star continued: "You could be the juiciest orange in the bunch but some people don't like oranges... But I was so worried about fitting into his life. I would think 'this is his ideal, I can be that. I will be that.' Not, 'do I want him?'" 

Hoda Kotb in the Today Show studios© NBC
Hoda Kotb got real about her relationships on Thursday's Today with Hoda & Jenna

Hoda is currently keeping her dating life private although she admitted in March that she had gone on her first date in two years, following on from her split from former finacé Joel Schiffman. 

She made the confession about her love life while appearing on The Kelly Clarkson Show, and said: "Something did happen the other day that hasn’t happened in two years … I had a date! I had a date!” 

TODAY -- Pictured: Hoda Kotb on Wednesday, April 3, 2024© Getty Images
Hoda is currently single although recently revealed she has been going on dates again

After the audience cheered, the mother-of-two added: "But you know what it was? It was just a date. It was nothing but a date." 

Hoda had previously mentioned her plans to go on a date while interview Jennifer Lopez in February. 

Jenna helped set up the date for Hoda© ABC
Jenna has set up Hoda on a date before

"I just told her I have a date tonight, and that wasn't supposed to be made public either," the TV star admitted, although didn't give any further details.

Hoda shares her two young children, Haley, seven, and Hope, four, with Joel, and has remained on good terms with him. They went their separate ways at the beginning of 2022, when Hoda announced the news of their split live on Today with Hoda & Jenna. 

Hoda co parents her daughters with ex Joel
Hoda co parents her daughters with ex Joel Schiffman

She told co-star Jenna that they had spoken long and hard about the decision and that they had remained good friends and dedicated co-parents. 

The former couple still celebrate many of the holidays together and for Father's Day last year, she paid a sweet tribute to her ex, writing on Instagram that he was a "great dad," while accompanying the message with some sweet pictures of him and their daughters. 

Hoda Kotb and Joel Schiffman © Kevin Mazur
Hoda and Joel split in 2022

At the time of their separation, Hoda told Jenna Bush Hager on Today: "Joel and I have had a lot of prayer and meaningful conversations over the holidays and we decided that we are better as friends and parents than we are as an engaged couple. So we decided we are going to start this new year on our new path as loving parents to our adorably delightful children and as friends. 

"It's not like something happened. They say sometimes relationships are meant to be there for a reason, a season or a lifetime, this was for a season."

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