Jools Oliver has previously revealed that she would love to welcome a sixth child with husband Jamie Oliver, and on Wednesday the mother-of-five made the heartbreaking confession that since welcoming son River in 2016 she has suffered three miscarriages.
Talking to Zoe Hardman and Georgia Dayton on their Made By Mammas podcast, Jools was asked about wanting one more child and made the surprising revelation.
Jamie and Jools welcomed their fifth child in 2016
"When you first came in the podcast you said you were contemplating, you really wanted to go for a sixth child," Zoe told her.
"I really do, I really do but I've just had three miscarriages since then and I'm thinking… and a recent one three weeks ago and I'm thinking: 'No,' I dunno. I do want to, but I've got to mentally check that it's a good idea to do. And also physically because I am 45 as I always say, nearly 46. So it's a little bit dodgy.
"Jamie is still up for it, kind of… not really. I haven't got long, maybe another year and then I really will just shut that chapter off because I am very happy and I am pretty full up at the moment as it is. But just that little baby, it's a terrible thing to keep wanting something and you can't help it," she explained.
River Rocket is staring school in September
Talking openly about her five miscarriages, she added: "I went to see the doctor the other day and he said, 'How are you mentally?' and I thought about it and I went: 'Well, this is the fifth one now,' I had two before River, and they've been early ones, the last two have been at 6 ½ weeks, so I just feel... I'm really good at going 'Right, I'm pregnant but it won’t work so I'm just going to carry on,' whilst everyone gets really into it and I have really learnt to not because I'm kind of not very positive about it."
The 45-year-old also revealed why she had kept her latest miscarriage a secret from her mother: "I did have a pretty dangerous one, I think it was my second one which was really dangerous for myself so my family don't want me to do it again. They think 'You've got five, you've got healthy children, just be grateful.'
The designer shares lots of pictures of her kids on Instagram
"I understand because my life is more important so I sometimes may not tell the sisters because I don't want to hurt their feelings, I'd rather just not say because they'll be worried about me specially during lockdown... telling my mum, well, especially because I couldn't see her, would have really upset her so I kept that quiet. She knows now, but, you know…at the time I didn't tell her," she said.