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Meghan Markle reveals she tried to seek professional help after having suicidal thoughts

The Duchess of Sussex became visibly emotional in the interview

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Ainhoa Barcelona
Ainhoa BarcelonaContent Managing Editor
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The Duchess of Sussex has opened up about her mental health, admitting she had suicidal thoughts while she was pregnant with her son Archie.

Speaking during an interview with Oprah Winfrey on Oprah With Meghan and Harry: A CBS Primetime Special, Meghan revealed that she had asked The Firm to seek professional help but was barred.

MORE: Prince Harry and Meghan's interview with Oprah - all the surprising revelations we learnt

"I was really ashamed to say it and to admit it to Harry, because I know how much loss he has suffered," said Meghan. "But I knew if I didn't say it, that I would do it and I just didn't want to be alive any more and that was a very clear and real and frightening constant thought."

WATCH: HELLO! Insider: Harry and Meghan's Oprah Interview

Welling up, the pregnant Duchess revealed how her husband "cradled her" when she shared her feelings. She also revealed how she asked the royal family, also known as The Institution, for professional help.

"I went to the institution and I said that I needed to go somewhere to get help," said Meghan. "I said I've never felt this way before and I need to go somewhere and I was told that I couldn't, that it wouldn't be good for the institution.

"I share this because there are so many people who are afraid to voice that they need help."

MORE: Harry and Meghan's Oprah interview as it happened

MORE: 25 extraordinary photos of royals crying in public

Meghan revealed that the reply from The Firm was that there was "nothing" they could do because the Duchess wasn't a "paid employee of the institution".

"This was emails and me begging for help and saying very specifically I'm concerned for my mental welfare," said Meghan.

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Meghan said that Harry "cradled" her after she shared her feelings

During the tell-all interview, Meghan spoke about stepping into life as a royal, marriage, motherhood, her philanthropic work and how she is handling life under intense public pressure. She also clarified reports that she had made her sister-in-law Kate cry in the lead-up to the royal wedding.

MORE: Meghan Markle reveals special garden feature dedicated to son Archie at home

"Did you make Kate cry?" Oprah asked, to which Meghan said, after pausing: "No, no, the reverse happened. And I don't say that to be disparaging to anyone."

She continued: "It was a really hard week of the wedding and she was upset about something but she owned it and she apologised and she bought me flowers, and a note apologising. She did what I would do if I knew that I hurt someone."

"She's a good person," the Duchess added.

WHERE TO WATCH: In the US, the show was broadcast on Sunday evening on CBS. In the UK, CBS Presents Oprah with Meghan and Harry will be broadcast on Monday night at 9pm on ITV, and on ITV hub.

If you have been affected by this story and wish to seek help, Samaritans (116 123) operates a 24-hour service available every day of the year. If you prefer to write down how you're feeling, or if you're worried about being overheard on the phone, you can email Samaritans at

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